I'll Cry For You
by Solitary Shadows
Summary: Rei and Kai thought their love was perfect. Everyone did. Everything went so perfectly. But Rei learns there's no such thing as a perfect love. Because if there was, he wouldn't have to cry. KxR one shot.


A/N: My shot at writing an angst. Orange-Sama forced me! Don't blame me, this is one of my first angst that I wrote by myself without Amy's help.

Disclaimer: Don't own it, never will.

**I'LL CRY FOR YOU  
**

A pair of pale hands gripped the sides of the railing as the dark-haired boy leaned over it, tears streaming down his face and into the water below. He kept his head bowed and his hair veiled any part of his face that could have been seen by anyone. He was alone on this particular day and the blustery wind swept past him violently, the chill stinging his bare arms but he hardly felt it. He hardly felt anything at all anymore. The once bright-eyed youth had been reduced to a trembling mess as he used the railing as a weak support. Never before had he felt such a grinding pain, such a loss.

Rei Kon would never forget the day that he lost the most important person in his life. Kai Hiwatari.

**_July, 2004_**

_Rei bounced excitedly into Kai's apartment, his long raven hair a pleasant mess and his cheeks flushed with excitement. It was eight hours before the party with all the other beybladers. He couldn't wait to see his old team again. Rei was almost glowing in excitement and he sneaked up behind his boyfriend, arms sliding around him from behind._

"Hey!" He said cheerily. "Are you excited about tonight?"

Kai didn't need to turn around. He knew right away as those thin arms slid around him who it would be. "Or course I'm excited." He laughed softly and turned in Rei's arms to face him. "How could I not be?"

Rei beamed up at his lover and kissed him gently. "I'm excited too. These next eight hours can't go by fast enough."

"You're telling me." Kai rolled his eyes playfully. "But come on…we have to get the rest of this stuff to the BBA. I heard we're low on soda."

The younger boy nodded emphatically and helped his lover as they gathered things they would need. It was just a few leftover things and they hauled them into the van before jumping into the hummer. Rei curled up on the seat like a small child, his head resting on Kai's shoulder.

Even now certain memories still brought a smile to Rei's face. He tried so hard to focus on how many good memories they'd had together. The good memories always outweighed the bad in Rei's mind. It was all he had left of Kai.

**_August, 2004_**

_Kai smiled faintly as he leaned against the door frame of Rei's room. He didn't have to knock anymore, since Rei had given him a key to his apartment. He'd crept in and closed the door quietly so the boy wouldn't hear him. Rei still didn't notice him as he was at his desk, looking through his picture album. Kai watched as his boyfriend rubbed his eyes. Taking this as a queue the older boy quietly padded across the carpeted floor holding the two ends of a necklace in each hand. He smiled as he came up behind the younger boy and placed it around his neck._

Rei let out a small gasp of surprise since he hadn't heard Kai come in. "You scared me." Rei laughed softly and blinked as the necklace was clasped around his neck.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." Kai kneeled down next to the other and gently turned the rotating chair that Rei sat on so that he was now facing his lover. "You know what tomorrow is?"

"How could I forget?" Rei asked softly, looking to the necklace. "We've been together almost a year. Just a couple more hours and it'll be our one year anniversary."

"That's right. This is just something small. It's engraved." Kai took hold of the small white gold ring that hung from the end of the chain. He turned it so that the younger boy could see the inscription. In Chinese characters it read "Kai and Rei, together forever."

Rei's eyes went soft as he read the inscription and they traveled from the ring to his boyfriend. "Kai…I…really love it." He whispered, not trusting his own voice.

The older boy blushed faintly. "I'm glad that you do." Kai nodded. Gently he took hold of the other's chin and kissed him deeply, lovingly.

Rei had melted into that kiss, feeling the security and the bond that was ever growing between the two of them. To their friends and team mates, they were the perfect couple. They each brought out the best in the other. They were a healthy couple. They had their disagreements and their arguments but in the end they were both able to accept what couldn't be changed about each other and moved on, loving each other more.

The next day had marked their first year together. They'd spent the entire day and night together. It was the first night that they said the inevitable 'I love you' to each other. The first night they'd made love, giving each other their virginity, and the first night their bodies and souls had united as one. It all seemed to be a perfect fairy tale.

Remembering back to their one year anniversary, Rei's fingers moved subconsciously to the ring that he still wore around his neck. Sometimes, he could still feel the kisses that Kai had so sweetly given him or the way that his touch felt as he'd turned his body over to his lover. All these things that slowly began to fade and come back when Rei least expected it to.

Rei couldn't really remember when things had started changing. The more the team progressed the more distant Kai had grown. The more engrossed in his blading he'd become. The nightly conversations where the two had spent hours upon hours on the phone became almost non-existent and the time they spent together dropped to a minimum. When they were together all Kai seemed to talk or think about was beyblading. Then the day came when Rei felt that things were quickly spiraling downward.

**_June, 2005_**

_There was a determination in Rei's step as he entered the BBA early the next day. He knew that Kai was in a meeting at the moment since he had voluntarily taken the positing of 'team leader' and refused to let his team mates take on any of the responsibility. He didn't feel that things would get done properly unless he was handling them. Taking a seat outside of the conference room, Rei twirled the white daisy in his hand and waited._

Not more then twenty minutes later the door to the conference room opened and a horde of people, including leaders from the other teams, started filing out of the room. Some Rei recognized and other's he'd never seen before in his life. Finally there was a break in the crowd of people and Kai was the last to leave the room. He didn't even notice that Rei was sitting there.

Jumping up, the younger boy slid his hand into Kai's. "Kai…" He said softly and waited for his boyfriend to turn to him before presenting him with the daisy. "Can we maybe talk? Or go out to lunch, anything?"

The red, crimson eyes that looked into Rei's auburn ones looked worn and tired. "I can't, Rei. I have another meeting at three and shit load of things to finish." He didn't take the daisy that his boyfriend offered him.

Rei's face fell and he lowered the daisy to his side. "Oh…I see." He sucked in a shaky breath. "When do you think we can get together?" His voice was soft.

"I don't know!" Kai snapped at him, which caused Rei to jump and his eyes widened slightly.

"S-sorry…" Rei murmured softly. "I didn't mean to upset you. I was just wondering…"

"Well you're going to have to live with the fact that I can't be worried about things like that right now." Kai's tone was harsh and unsettling.

Rei's eyes stayed wide and he looked incredulously over his lover. "You can't be worried? Kai, I haven't seen you for more then a couple of minutes a day for the past three weeks."

Kai's hands rose to his head and he pressed two fingers to each temple, caressing them gently. "Look Rei, I know we haven't been able to spend a lot of time together but you have to understand that I haven't had time to think about anything else but how our team is compared to others. I'm sorry."

"So…you're putting beyblading before us?" The words barely left Rei's mouth and he choked back a small sob.

"Right now, yes." There was no remorse, no sense of caring emanating from the older boy and Rei felt his heart tighten in grief.

"That's not fair" He protested.

"Life isn't fair. Get over yourself and deal with it." Kai snorted before he turned on his heel and walked away.

The devastation of Kai's words struck a nerve so deep inside that the younger boy could barely breathe. The daisy that he held in his hands dropped to the floor and was left abandoned on the tile. Much like Rei's heart had been abandoned.

Rei whimpered softly as he watched Kai walk away from him. He couldn't call out to him. His voice caught in his throat when he opened his mouth. Instead he turned and walked in the opposite direction. He broke out into a run and ignored the people that stared at him and the voices that called and told him to slow down. He didn't bother to wipe away the tears that clung to his cheeks as he burst through the door and ran as fast as he could into the park. He dropped against a tree and cried. For hours he sat like that and cried.

The memory of that day brought fresh tears to Rei's eyes as he continued to stare down into the pond below him. He didn't notice that a light sprinkle had started over the park, nor would he have cared if he had noticed. What was left of his torn heart squeezed painfully in his chest and he took a couple of deep breaths, calming himself. The worst of the movie-like scene had yet to come. He tried not to think about it. Tried to stop it from causing him anymore pain, but like a demon it haunted his mind anyways.

**_August, 2005_**

_It was exactly one week before their two year anniversary but Rei was not excited about such an occasion. Ever since that day at the BBA when Kai had hurt him so much they'd barely spoken and the older boy had become even more engrossed in his blading. He barely slept, he barely ate, and he looked terrible. Whenever anyone tried to make things easier on him he was rude or sarcastic. Rei had learned to stay away from him when he was in such a state._

Rei lye back on the bed of his hotel room that night, holding the necklace that Kai had given him nearly a year ago and watched the ring on the end spin slowly, occasionally catching the light and shining brightly. One side shone in brilliance while the other side remained dark, much like the relationship that was now between him and Kai. The hope that the younger boy was holding onto was diminishing as the days went by.

A knock pulled the boy out of his memory and he sat up on the bed, quickly putting the necklace back on and getting off the bed. When he opened the door, his eyes lit up still to this day at the sight of his lover.

"Kai…hi…" Rei cast a sweet smile and stepped aside to allow his boyfriend entrance. He quickly slipped his arms around Kai's neck and leaned into kiss him. He froze immediately when his lover turned away from him.

"Please don't kiss me." Kai murmured softly. "It will only make this harder for me to do."

Something deep inside of Rei froze and he could feel the ice coldness running through his veins, seemingly replacing his blood. "M-make what harder…?" He was scared to ask.

Kai stood for a long time in silence, looking everywhere but directly at Rei. Finally after what seemed like ages to Rei, Kai's beautiful red eyes met the natural auburn of Rei's.

"Rei…I came here today…because…" Kai knit his brow and closed his eyes. When he opened them again they were cold and distant. The older boy had successfully masked his pain and guilt behind the cold façade. "This isn't working. Its not fair to you that I've been spending little to no time with you. Our relationship had pretty much died and I think it'd be best if I let you go and allowed you to move on."

The breath that Rei hadn't realized that he was holding choked him as his throat constricted, nearly cutting off his air supply. Tears stung the back of his eyes and he trembled all over. This couldn't be real. He had to be dreaming. Raising a hand to his arm, he pinched himself, his nails biting into the flesh. It hurt. He wasn't dreaming.

"Kai…no…please, don't do this to me. We can make this work. It just takes time and patience. Things will go back to normal once things settle down." Rei's voice was pleading when he finally found it, riddled with small sobs. "Please…don't leave me."

Kai's eyes flickered with pain for a split second but then it was gone as quick as it had come. He reached out and cupped the Rei's face in his hands. "Please don't make this harder on either of us, Rei. We both knew this was coming. We both felt it. There's no passion between us anymore. Not even when we made love last was their passion. It died months ago."

Rei shook his head against the other's hands, tears streaming down his face. "No, that's not true! There was still something, Kai."

The younger boy knew that what his lover said was true. The nights of passion had died and indeed, the last time they had slept together a month ago was nothing more than sex. It was the only time that Kai had ever been rough with him. Ever taken him with a slight malice and frustration in his actions.

"It is true, Rei. You and I both know that." Kai mumbled as he let go of the other's face. "Please…don't waist your tears on me. I'm not worth it."

At that point, Kai turned to leave but he'd barely reached the door when he felt a hand grip his wrist and heard a rustling sound. He turned to see that Rei was on his knees, his grip gentle and firm all at the same time. His ex-lover's gaze was on the ground and Kai inhaled sharply as he watched the younger boy.

Rei couldn't bring himself to look up at Kai as his shoulder trembled with silent sobs. Slowly, his fingers loosened around Kai's wrist and he winced as his lover left and closed the door. The dark haired boy clutched his shirt right over where his heart was. The small sobs broke out into a pained scream that could clearly be heard throughout the entire hall that his room was part of. He barely dragged himself into the bathroom before he vomited, emptying the little that was in his stomach. Once he was sure that he wasn't going to throw up again, Rei curled up on the bathroom floor and cried until his throat hurt and he dry heaved.

Never had he known such a pain as the one he knew now. The pain of losing the love of your life, the one person that he would have given his life for. The wound was so deep and Rei could feel his soul seeping through the emotional slash much like blood flowing from a physical wound. When he had no more tears to cry he simply lye on the tile floor, staring at the white washed wall, unblinking and blank.

Rei had moved from his location on the bridge to the swings that were near by. He couldn't tell the difference between the raindrops and the tears on his face. The rain was falling in almost a torrent as he sat there on the swing, rocking just faintly as he cried, still clutching the ring that he would never take off.

It was just a few days before his birthday. That didn't matter to him. Nothing really did. He'd mastered his own façade and remained the bright and cheerful person that he had once been. Whether his team mates knew that it was all a lie, he wasn't sure. If they didn't believe his guise then they didn't say anything. The tension between him and Kai was so thick that one could slice through it with a knife. They didn't speak unless it was absolutely necessary.

A sudden tightness in his chest caused Rei to look up from his spot on the ground. The rain made it difficult for him to see and he held a hand over his eyes to shield them from the rain. A familiar yet silhouetted figure stood just a few yards away from Rei. He didn't have to take a second guess to know who it was.

Kai stood looking at his ex-lover in the rain, his own face stained with tears and rain water. Though it was still difficult to see, Rei could make out the small details that he'd once known so well about the boy he was so deeply in love with.

Almost as if carried on the crystal raindrops, the familiar voice of Kai reached Rei's ears.

"I never stopped loving you…"

_**Fin**_

-------

A/N: Done! How was it? I kind of ran out of ideas of when I got to the end...yeah anyways, review!


End file.
